Need Scene Depth? View it From a New Angle

I went hiking recently. As I picked my way down the trail, sliding on wet rocks, using branches and tree trunks to lower myself past giant steps of rock, I thought about my book characters. They're presently being pursued through desert hills. Yet while my main character and his friend have obstacles, I realized a more realistic setting could give them additional organic challenges. They can’t just walk along a smooth slope. They should be scaling rocks above uneven ground, sliding down steep grades while clinging to tree roots. And in my story, it rained yesterday. Where are today's slick stones and muddy trail?

Getting out on that trail gave me a completely different way to look at my manuscript, somewhat akin to the Coke bottle story you've likely heard. A teacher challenged his class to draw a glass Coke bottle. Most drew variations on the Coke's unique curved shape. But one student's sketch made everyone wonder. He sketched one large circle with a smaller one inside it. His angle? Looking straight down.

If you’re struggling with where to go in your story, ask yourself: How can I look at this problem, plot, or character from a completely different angle?

If you're writing about exotic cooking, maybe you need to go try a restaurant that serves a kind of food you've never eaten before. Then, instead of your character complaining about "little green flecks" in his food, you can talk about the flavors of truffle oil, or Thai basil.

You don't have to go for a long, muddy hike. (I went for the waterfall. The story idea was a bonus.) Consider finding a new experience. Or ways to look at a common one in an uncommon way.

[This is a different version of my post at wifyr.com/blog]

WIFYR Recap #3: Children's Writing Cliches to Avoid

I'm guilty. If you're not sure you are, do a manuscript search. See how many times your characters roll their eyes, get various pains in their stomachs, have pounding hearts, or breathe deeply. I, for one, know my characters should have asthma to justify all the times I call attention to their lungs.

In Martine Leavitt's workshop at WIFYR, she talked about cliches. Any description of emotion that refers to internal organs--lungs included--is cliche. She says even vomiting is hard to do without sounding trite.

I've sometimes gone to absurd lengths to describe fear, sadness, or grief in a more original way, only to sound a little weird. "Her heart line-danced in her chest" or "His stomach mooed" may not be much of an improvement over pounding hearts or growling stomachs.

Martine suggested that instead of looking for new variations on old cliches, we try metaphor. One caveat: metaphors should be used sparingly, and should feel natural rather than superimposed on the scene.

In TOM FINDER, Martine Leavitt used gravity as a metaphor. In HECK SUPERHERO, she used quantum physics.We can find what works in our manuscripts by looking for patterns. She said our inner creative genius may come up in the repetition. To see it, we  must read our work over and over, looking carefully.

Martine spoke of the book, THE EVOLUTION OF CALPURINA TATE, and how the author spends pages describing how Calpurnia's mother, in her layers of long clothing, suffers from the heat. By contrast, Calpurnia sets off to discover a new species. In making this comparison, the author effectively shows how Calpurnia is destined to become a different species of woman.

She suggested when we're tempted to use a cliche, we instead have the character pause for a beat, then use objects specific to character and setting to describe the emotion. I took ten pages of a story I'm beginning, and was surprised to learn she liked the part where the character is upset with her father at breakfast. Instead of saying how angry she is, my mc looks down at her plate (the specific object) and says, "I hate poached eggs. It looks like a giant eyeball."

 As Martine Leavitt said, a good metaphor surprises with the unlikeness of things compared, while at the same time making reader marvel at how it fits.

My challenge for all of us is to look for the patterns already in our writing, and deepen them into relevant metaphors. Don't you love the idea of making a reader marvel?